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Meditation Poker and Fitness
Another day, smile.

I wake up rather late 3-4pm, my schedule is weird (or apparently normal) here in this household. I wake up first thing on my mind is poker. My mind hasn't seemingly exited the state of wanting to stop clicking. I took a slight rest yesterday after dabbling on the games for a long period of time. I hope to either do the same today, or focus on 6max. The plan is the same, I will look for who wants to play and if I get good enough action I will delay the 6max studying, if not I will study 6max. I will load 200NL+ again, I actually don't know why I decided to stop loading it at some point, I think its still worth while if its only fishes I'm playing considering they die fast. The cool part is that I can always hit this cool button every time I feel its not worth it anymore, its called "sit out".
Weird. I was throwing HU under the bus, but it does seem like the people want to battle.

I am getting actually pretty good action in general. Maybe I shouldn't swap to 6max and just master this. Or maybe I'm just running exceptionally well in it. Eitherway.. I haven't got time to study 6max yet. At 43k hands right now, played 6 hours straight need slight break.
Now at 45K hands, hm. lol, crazy that I am almost on pace into my monthly goals. I definitely should push for more volume next month. Considering I got 25% of my volume just in these two days is an indicator of how much more effort I should be putting..

I swear on it.. next month will be the month where everything changes. If HUNL is riding this good and there are tons of games available, I don't mind battling I'm in good hands. God I'm so close I can feel it next month will be the month. It just has to be.

I prepared and worked so hard for this. Let it begin, one of the most immaculate grinds of all time. The bigger picture, it will be massive and I will break through. Today and tomorrow will be some preparation. I'm ready.

Super stoked for this. Excited for the games and my ambitions are riding high.

Next month I will strive to hit 100,000 hands while performing absolutely well. Its fucking possible. I bummed it this month a bit, I got lazy I stopped looking around and hunting regulars. I did 9K hands in these last two days ffs. This shit is possible.
Breathe in, Breathe out. Time.

I've had some issues where I click buttons without having a specific reason for doing so. I think we all hit that particular zone, especially when you are tilted. The only time I think that is excusable is when you have your opponent solved and you want to punish him for as much money as possible as quick as possible before he notices. That is a rare occurrence and almost never happens. For the normality of the games you encounter, breathe in, breathe out, take some time. You don't have to play totally slow and time bank every single decision. In times like these I always have to continually write about this and remind myself to space the decision to turn/ river decisions or 3 bet pots for me to think about things before formulating my final decisions as those are the bigger pots. It keeps things simpler, and you don't have to totally take your time for everything as you lose value /hourly by slowing your hands per hour.
I must remember to be professional.

Today was a time where I caught myself, its so tempting sometimes to do something stupid. I wanted to immediately go into the games without eating, drinking, or doing anything really just when I woke up. Being professional is super crucial in order to stay on top of the games and maintain your edge. As the time's are changing, the environment is changing, the players are improving I must take every single possibility I can in order to ensure I have my edge. Writing does this for me, it helps me rationalize things and help keep myself sharp before entering. It lets me get rid of any possible thoughts I would have outside of poker and have it placed out here so when I do play poker I can solely focus on poker. There are a couple of key things to remember today, its to slow down the tempo when necessary, set alarms while playing to keep myself sharp and select my spots that I play in. I am aiming for relatively big goals this month, so starting the routine correctly is just as important before playing the long sessions
Review day, preparation for tomorrow.

Probably the part where my mind resists the most. It doesn't like doing this for whatever reason, which means more then ever I must do it. Its just a mandatory, a staple. I have to review and find out my common errors, write down the common mental stuff that I must be prepared for and battle another day. Today will be a mix and mash, I will be dabbling and concentrating on some 6max perspectives so I can get a better understanding of how to play preflop correctly, then I will be focused on the HUNL perspective. I may do this tomorrow to if I find it necessary.

As for the hand volume, I knocked out 4,000 hands/100,000 hands which I'm somewhat happy with, but unhappy because I punted off 1.5 buy ins which could have easily been prevented, which is the equivalent of 1000-2000 hands or so. Anyway, because of that I do need some work, I have an idea of what is going on as I played straight without doing the common routines and nourishing myself while playing : eating/drinking/stretching etc. which I think is a near mandatory for me, I know I can't play 4-5 hours straight multi tabling intense games without even a small slight break, just to get things back in track. I have to be able to do this if I want to be better at the games I'm in.

When I do begin playing again I am positive it will lead towards a better direction. I am super optimistic for this month, and am anticipating a massive month.
Forgot to talk about March Goals.

Poker Goals:

65K Hands. [50k/65k]

10 Hours of MentalGame/Theory Related Things. [good]

Meditation daily. [Probably around 65% of the time]

Study everything about these specific players and try to be exactly like them (Otb_RedBaron, Jungleman and forhayley). Did Jungleman and a bit of Hayley/Baron

Gym Goals:

64 KG In Weight [Ended at 64.3kg]

Lift 20KG on each side via bench press. [Nope did 17.5 kg on each side 1 time tho]

Life Goals:

Clean/Organized Room/Healthier Habits. [Better, still needs more work]

Talk to family twice a month. [1x]

Go on a 3 day trip in Gorenjska. [Nope]

Actually March wasn’t that bad, in retrospect.

I’ll talk about April Goals later.

April Goals.


100K Hands

10 Hours of MentalGame/Theory Related Things

Meditation + 1 hour 30 Minute Alarm Rituals before playing/while playing

Dabble in some 6max, do some work on it

Gym Goals:

66 KG In Weight

Lift 20KG on each side via bench press ; 100KG Squats ; 80KG Deadlifts (believe those were the numbers my coach said I should strive for)

Life Goals:

Clean/Organized Room/Healthier Habits.

Talk to family once a month.

Finish reading “Switch” by Chip Heath

Start an early morning ritual; wake up at 5:30am.
So this 5:30 thing isn't going to work, hands and tilting.

It just takes too long to adjust and my mind can't play in that state. It wastes a lot of valuable time and I took multiple days to try to adjust. I'm at about 7.3k hands now, mainly playing yesterday + one day on the 2nd. So I think I can be in good contention of hitting my goals. I'm optimistic still, there are still a couple of key things that I'm leaking in, a lot of frustration and lack of acceptance sometimes. I am goign to remember to do things like that, I also will keep myself in check. To tilt is a common thing I think for everoyne, its just to come to a resolution and prevent it for next time. Even as I write this I still feel a sense of anger thinking about yesterday. Its not very good. Its something I need to realize that is part of the games and I have to accept, things like POWER blacking out, or Internet DC'ing etc my mind hasn't come to figure it out yet. I guess I can count that as variance since its such a very rare occurrence. I will accept this. Its okay. Play as best as you can at the tables, and whatever other things may occur accept it as it is, consider it as another form of variance that the games are trying to throw at you.
Losing and Winning, Oddly enough it seems like you only reevaluate when you lose I do imagine that is relatively a leak, but have watched many people and it seems like many of the top players do the same ride the waves of variance while winning and smash all, when losing sit down and figure **** out.

Both is fun in there own way. When you lose you try to figure out and pinpoint what went wrong, was it because they were the better player? Why were they the better player? did you play off during that session? How was your focus? Were your ranges off? Did you just cbet for no particular reason? In the midst of the game I sat and realized almost nothing, and just played the best I knew, afterwards I realized I particularly played without a specific reason or without finding a particular edge in that spot. I flew over my head and rode the wrong wave it happens, post session is when you can truly evaluate or think things over if you lived up to your own expectations, at this moment I think I did okay, but not elite, if you aren't elite in your own expectations in playing you aren't going to survive in the streets. I ofc ran bad but you can never blame it entirely on that, blaming it on that makes you a sore loser and you will forever be cemented in that mindset without ever considering to try to get better. I noticed I probably peeled off a bit too light on almost every street, re running through all the relatively questionable spots made me say aha this is what went wrong and I actually hated majority of the spots I hit that 'call' button in. It wasn't variance, only partially, majority of it was because... I did get outclassed and was the inferior player in that line up at that given moment, and possibly even now. I will give it a bit before that alters and the edge will return, I'll be ready to go at it again.
I like losing.

it always humbles me, reminds me that I am not as good as I thought I was and am still making a ton of mistakes. Freeze me in the lab, I will be reviewing and making my return soon, back in a few days.

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